Thank you, William Styron
“The madness of depression is the antithesis of violence. It is a storm indeed, but a storm of murk. Soon evident are the slowed-down responses, near paralysis, psychic energy throttled back close to zero. Ultimately, the body is affected and feels sapped, drained.”
–William Styron, Darkness Visible
William Styron wrote the book that literally changed my life, and that of many other people. In 1990 he published a slim volume entitled, Darkness Visible: A Memoir of Madness, a memoir of the battle with depression that brought him to the edge of suicide.
Before he wrote Darkness Visible Styron was known as the prize-winning author of Lie Down in Darkness, Sophie’s Choice and The Confessions of Nat Turner, among others. I read Sophie’s Choice years ago and found it, perhaps ironically, fairly depressing. Not surprisingly, Styron theorized that his underlying depression had colored his writing for decades.
For me Darkness Visible was a revelation. I’m not even sure why I picked it up. Perhaps, as often is the case, the subconscious knew what to do when my conscious mind was in denial. I had no idea, at least consciously, that I suffered from depression. I did know something was wrong, but couldn’t identify it.